Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Yes, that's Frodo in the background, unfortunately, and not Faramir.
Looking at this picture, I have to convince myself that it's real. My brain cannot make the shape of my body make sense -- like when you see a really hugely fat person and can't reconcile how their body relates to itself? Sorry, that was mean. But you know you've had that thought before.
Early in my pregnancy one of the things I did to make sure I stayed sane and to make it more real for me was at the beginning of each week I would google how many weeks I was and read about all the things that were going on. Like how I should expect to feel and what new thing was developing in the baby. It was something I looked forward to. It helped measure the time for me when I wasn't showing and couldn't feel the baby move yet. These days, though, it's been like reading the same week over and over again for weeks now. "Because of blah and blah you can expect to feel heartburn and back pain!" Like it's news. I guess even the websites know that at this point it's basically just a patience game, nothing really exciting until the Big Moment of Doom & Awesomeness.
So Week 32 isn't much different from the last few weeks, except that I'm getting more protusiony and less comfortable. Plus the mounting anticipation which is becoming just one more entity growing inside me. Suddenly starting to get really nervous about the hospital, for some reason. I've never been hospitalized before, so it's probably just fear of the unknown.
In other news, The Two Towers is my least favorite of the movie adaptations. I'm thinking of rereading the series. My dad gave us a copy of Man's Search for Meaning for Christmas, and while I'm really interested in it and love that sort of thing to read, it's been a little too intense for my poor, fragile emotions. I think I'll do better reading about intense things that haven't actually happened to people.
In case you think I'm content to let my blog design be horrible, rest assured that I am indeed in the midst of a redesign (still.) I currently lack the mental capacity or desire to try and figure out html junk, and I'm stumped creatively as well. So, you know, pardon the dust and stupid layout.